HE CHEATED! NOW WHAT?
By Doris AC Johnson, MA of PSY, ABA
Insecurity has been the thorn in your relationship with good reason. Because he cheated.
Deception has decapitated the head from all your relationships. Why? Because he cheated. You were not looking for it. It was searching for you. Bull’s eye! Blah! Blah! Blah! Now what?
I have honestly invested and inserted myself into what I believed were the births of lifelong unions. We want it to last. We do not expect it to be free of blemishes, but we want honest effort and reciprocity. It goes a little further than you show me yours and I will show you mine. Close your eyes and put your lips like this. All that’s cute when you aren’t in the lion’ den…when you aren’t a pawn in a king’s game.
It is a hurting feeling when the guideline of your relationship is the guide to his lies. He has used every word of what you are looking for as his guide to successfully lie to you. I am not Corona…so I ask that you take your mask off before you talk to me.
Cheating happens…but I cannot do a serial cheater.
USE YOUR EYES. Mother used to say that my big heart would get me in trouble. (I’m thinking that it might be my big mouth…but anyway). She also used to warn me that if you know that snake bites, then why you keep letting him in your house? In other words, I had a reputation for being a repeat offender because I kept doing it and doing it until the consequences caught up to me.
All snakes do not crawl. If you are familiar with the Bible…the book of Genesis chapter 13 verse fourteen then you get my point. If you are not knowing…The serpent once walked upright like man. It was at the point when he was deceptive that God reduced him to slithering on his belly and eating dirt. Again, I say that all snakes do not crawl.
I have heard it said that infidelity is not necessarily the determining factor of whether a relationship should be terminated. Some of us will nurse the relationship back to health even if we have to use a defibrillator, chest compression, mouth to mouth, and ignore the flatline going across the screen.
I am almost fifty. I do not have the time to be a clown in anyone’s circus. I retired my suit a long time ago. I am a foodie. Love to eat. Food is my friend. I may not make all the healthy choices, but I do not like the bitter taste of emotional homicide.
Some of us have a disclaimer, and by some of us…that would be me, if you burn the bridge, I will burn the boat. Consider yourself warned!”