Help! I’ve Fallen and I Can’t Commit
By Doris AC Johnson
If you know me, you know that I love loaded potatoes, broccoli, bread, salmon, salad, shrimp, chocolate, tea, sewing, writing, candles, making sense of the hidden obvious, my only grandchild, and one cup of coffee per day will do!! Because of my undying desire for them, I keep them near. In fact, a life without these things is a life not worth living at all. These are my guilty pleasures and I don’t care. Follow me…let me explain.
I consider anyone who has found true love a relationship success story! And I say that time and time again. I love love from the bottom of my heart. It’s a beautiful thing. Wouldn’t you agree that most of us have the following in common? You are either in love, looking for love, or just fell out of love. It’s a universal language. We all want love and acceptance. You are human and it’s ok. What worries me is that we make excuses for the hidden obvious, and I call it that because the truth is in front of you even when you turn your back. No judgment here because I am still on trial for the things that I have done previously and this is how I know.
The point is this. Most of us spend too much time in pretend and practice relationships. We are giving our whole heart and showing our hand prematurely. We are coupled with someone who is not being truthful. That someone is you who believes that a person in love will run from love. I like shoes. When I see a pair that I want, I will either purchase them or work to get them out of layaway. My primary focus are those shoes. I promise you that passion and love go a long way. Think about a time that you wanted something, and you worked for it. Love is no different. If you have been doing all the things that you would typically do in a healthy relationship and your “partner” or “participant” shy’s away…stops you at the door, it probably doesn’t stem from a fear of commitment. It comes from failure to go further because they made that decision (for whatever reason) and you helped when you broke your principles to be more than what they were. (just someone along for the ride) You deserve better. Let me reiterate…I am not your judge or your jury, I am here to dispel that myth.
You are right on so many levels. When you are into someone and they don’t give that same energy back, it makes you step back and think. Is this the right person for me? Are they feeling me the way I am feeling them? Maybe I read their actions wrong. Pay attention to signs before you give up so many years to realize the whole relationship was fake.
Listen here, no time to lie to ourselves about love, the love we want and the love we have to give. I think the hugest mistake we make, is believing love has no scars.